Better Than Me
by LunarEclipse360
Summary: "Just leave please." "But..." "Go" she looked at him with sad eyes and walked out of the room, leaving to never return. "You deserve much better than me." oneshot songfic to 'Better Than Me' by Hinder.


**Better Than Me**

_by: LunarEclipse360_

**_Disclaimer: I don't own High School Musical or the song 'Better Than Me' by Hinder_**

**A/N: okay I made this because I really like this song. There is no main girl in this one so you can put whoever you want in the girl's position. That way everyone's happy.**

Troy sat on his bed staring at the picture in his hands. He gently glided a finger over it and smiled sadly. It was a picture of him and her on their first date. It had felt like so long ago when he had first asked her out. Sure it had been five years ago but to him it felt longer. Now she was gone...and it was his fault.

_**I think you can do much better than me**_

_**After all the lies I made you believe**_

"_Troy who's April?" she had asked one night as they sat down for dinner._

"_She's just someone in my class."_

"_Oh. Well she's been blowing up our answering machine."_

"_That's just because we're supposed to do this project that's all." she nodded and went back to eating._

'So many lies I told her. So many times I made her believe me. Why did I do it? Why did I cheat on her?' he asked and ran a hand through his hair. He stood up and put the picture back on the dresser.

_**Guilt kicks in and I start to see**_

_**The edge of the bed**_

_**Where your nightgown used to be**_

He looked over to the edge of the bed and swore he saw her nightgown still sitting there where it had always been. He shook his head, trying to get the image out of his head. He knew it was his guilt. He had lied to her for three of the five years he had been with her and his guilt was at an all time high.

'What made me cheat on her? She was perfect in every way and yet...I still broke her heart.'

He walked out of his bedroom and into the hallway. Everything seemed the same to him. The only thing that was missing was her.

'Nothing's going to be the same without her.'

_**I told myself I won't miss you**_

_**But I remember**_

_**What it feels like beside you**_

So many times he had told himself that he wasn't going to miss her but every time he closed his eyes, he could still feel her. He leaned against the wall and closed his eyes.

_Troy stood against the wall with her leaning against him. His arms were wrapped around her waist and her hands were on his chest._

"_You know I love you right?" he asked and she nodded._

"_Of course I do." she said and leaned up, capturing his lips. He kissed back and ran his hand up and down her spine. She shivered and pulled away. "Only you have that affect on me." he smiled and kissed her forehead._

"_You're so beautiful." she smiled softly and leaned her head against his chest. He pulled her closer and kissed the top of her head before resting his chin on it._

'She was beautiful. Beautiful than anyone I had ever met. But I still managed to screw it up with her.'

_**I really miss your hair in my face**_

_**And the way your innocence taste**_

_**And I think you should know this**_

_**You deserve much better than me**_

_Troy walked up behind her as she fixed her make-up in the mirror. He wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair._

"_Troy." she said with a giggle. She turned around in his arms and he leaned down, covering her lips with his. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he picked her up, setting her on the bathroom sink._

_His tongue glided along her bottom lip and she opened it, allowing his tongue to enter. She ran her hand through his hair, softly grasping pieces of his hair in between her fingers._

'How did I mess that up? How could I have betrayed her? She was perfect and I took advantage of that. I didn't deserve her.'

He walked into the kitchen and opened the cabinet. He grabbed a vodka and opened it, taking a swig from it. It burned as it slid down his throat but he didn't care. She was the one that he wanted to spend his life with but he had messed it all up.

_**While looking through your old box of notes**_

_**I found those pictures I took**_

_**That you were looking for**_

He walked back into his room and went under the bed. He pulled out an old shoe box and opened it. He pulled out small pieces of paper and smiled as he read what was on them. They used to write notes to each other all the time. Whether it was about something important or they just wanted to say they loved each other, this is what they did.

He glanced down and saw a bunch of pictures at the bottom of the box. He smiled sadly and picked them up.

'So here's where they were' he thought as he looked through them.

All of these were pictures he had taken of her. Each one of them was her with a smile on her face. Her eyes showed nothing of hurt or pain. Not like they did when he ended their relationship, his guilt too much to bear.

_**If there's one memory I don't want to lose**_

_**That time of the mall**_

_**You and me in the dressing room**_

"_Troy how do you like this?" she asked and he smiled._

"_You look hot." she smiled and he walked over to her. He ran a hand over her cheek and kissed her._

"_How about you help me take this off?" she asked suggestively and he smirked._

"_Why not." he followed her into the dressing room. He immediately pushed her against the wall and captured her lips with his. She wrapped one leg around his waist and he placed a hand on it. He propped her up and she wrapped her other leg around him. _

_Neither one broke the kiss as they started undressing each other. They tried to stay silent as to not let anyone know what they were doing._

A tear slid down his face and onto one of the pictures. He had been stupid for letting her go. He had been stupid for cheating on her. She still didn't know he had though. He didn't have the courage to tell her, afraid of seeing that pained look in her eyes get worse.

_**I told myself I won't miss you**_

_**But I remember**_

_**What it feels like beside you**_

He put the box back under the bed and crawled under the sheets. He tried not to miss her but he couldn't help it. She was his first love and he would always remember her.

He turned to his side and sighed as he pictured her lying beside him. Her face haunted him every night and everyday. She was forever embedded in his brain along with the painful look in her eyes.

'I fucked up big time and now I'll never get her back. If I try then there's no way I would be able to keep what happened behind her back a secret. Why the hell did I do it? Why did I let myself get caught up in someone else? Why the fuck did I forget what I had right in front of me?'

_**I really miss your hair in my face**_

_**And the way you innocence tastes**_

_**And I think you should know this**_

_**You deserve much better than me**_

He closed his eyes for a split second and he could feel her hair against his face. He smiled and reached over to see if it really was there but all he felt was the fabric of the sheets. He sighed and flipped onto his back.

His eyes opened and he stared at the ceiling. Her face appeared before him and he reached up to touch it but all he touched was air.

'I'm so stupid. I let the perfect woman for me slip from my hands.'

_**The bed I'm lying in is getting colder**_

_**Wish I never would've said it's over**_

_**And I can't pretend...**_

Every night, he went to sleep feeling cold and alone and he woke up the same way the next day. He was never going to feel that warmth next to him. He would always feel cold just like his heart had felt the day he had told her that it was over.

"_I think we should...break up." he looked over at her and she looked at him with sad eyes._

"_Why?"_

"_I just...I can't do us anymore."_

"_Why can't you? We've never had any problems"_

"_We're just not right for each other." she let a few tears slip past her eye lids and stared at him. His heart was breaking every second._

"_So this is it? This is the end of us?" he nodded and looked away from her._

"_I'm sorry."_

"_So am I." she grabbed her coat and walked towards the door. "Goodbye Troy." she whispered and left their apartment._

He sat up and ran his hands through his hair. He had been a fool. He should have just told her the truth. Maybe they could have worked something out. He stood up and grabbed the vodka bottle, drinking it down.

_**I won't think about you when I'm older**_

_**Cause we never really had our closure**_

_**This can't be the end**_

He wiped his mouth of the droplets of vodka that stayed on his lips. Everything started spinning and he could see her smiling face in front of his eyes. He smiled and walked towards her. But as his vision cleared he saw that it was only a mirror in front of him. He scowled, hating his reflection.

'I screwed up. I screwed up and now I'm paying the price.'

He closed his eyes and her face reappeared in front of his closed eye lids.

"Why won't you leave me alone?" he screamed before throwing the empty bottle against the mirror, its shattered pieces falling to the floor.

_**I really miss you hair in my face**_

_**And the way your innocence tastes**_

_**And I think you should know this**_

_**You deserve much better than me**_

This was his fault. She was gone because he had made her leave. There was no one to blame but himself. He stared at the broken pieces of the mirror on the floor before falling to his knees.

"_I love you so much Troy."_

"_I love you too."_

"Leave me alone." he yelled at no one, reaching up to cover his ears. "Just go away."

"_Promise me we'll always be together forever."_

"_You know it."_

"_Really Troy. Promise me." he smiled softly and nodded._

"_I promise."_

"I made a promise and I broke it." he said as sobs racked his body.

_**I really miss your hair in my face**_

_**And the way innocence tastes**_

_**And I think you should know this**_

_**You deserve much better than me**_

"She deserves so much better than me." he whispered.

"Troy?" he lifted his head slowly, her concerned face appearing in front of him

_**And I think you should know this**_

_**You deserve much better than me**_

He stood up slowly, not believing she was actually there. He rubbed his eyes to make sure that he wasn't hallucinating.

"Is it really you?" she smiled sadly and nodded.

_**And I think you should know this**_

_**You deserve much better than me**_

He couldn't move, he could barely breathe. She was really standing in front of him, staring at him with those concerned eyes. The same one he had fallen in love with five years ago.

"I-I'm sorry."

"It's okay Troy."

"No it's not." he said and closed his eyes. "It's not okay."

_**And I think you should know this**_

_**You deserve much better than me**_

"Troy?"

"I-I don't deserve you."

"Troy it's okay."

"No it's not." he yelled and she looked taken aback. "Just leave please."

"But..."

"Go" she looked at him with sad eyes and walked out of the room, leaving to never return. "You deserve much better than me."

_**And I think you should know this**_

He fell to the ground and leant against his bed. He looked towards the doorway where she had once stood. It was goodbye and that was how he was going to keep it.


End file.
